Here Lately!

Lately, I have really been struggling emotionally.  I do not regret the decision I made to get out of coaching.  I know that God was calling me to give more of myself to my own children. However, it has been tough. It has been tough because for as long as I could remember all I wanted to do was coach. And if I wasn’t “Coach Schubert” then who was I?  It has been tough being in the classroom for 10 periods a day, when I am so used to being active and outside. It has been tough not being known as the tough coach and merely as the “new English teacher.”  It has been tough seeing my former team have so much success without me.  If I had to describe a perfect day – it would be winning the state tournament with my daughter as the MVP – or is it?  My wish for my children is that they know Jesus and his love and his works.  That they know what family means.  That it’s not ok to sacrifice family time for things that will tarnish and fade.  Holding on to the things that last (from 8 seconds the movie)  This week has been really tough because my old team went undefeated in district and are heading into the playoffs – without me.  But last week, God put some morning devos in front of my eyes just at the right time.  And today, I got the Proverbs 31 devo and it is absolutely perfect:

·      My daughters (children) will be gone all too soon.

·      These years they’re in school will be mere memories before I know it.  I want me listening to them, giving them my full attention, to be a part of those memories.

·      It’s so important we take time for talking, listening and parenting well.

·      Investing in children is a privilege.  Whether they admit it or not, they want us to hear their stories and learn about their days.

·      Pour through me to love on them.

Affirmation that I made the right decision.  That God knew that my kids needed me.  I need to be “MOM” for them.  I need to be there for homework, and talks and girlfriends and practices and dinner on the table – every night!  All the energy and focus I would have put into basketball needs to be put into them – and even though I feel like I haven’t done much of that – I need to put down the papers, get off the computer or the phone and BE THERE for them.  They deserve the best of me for the short period of time that they are with me.  To play with, to laugh with, to grow with.  It won’t be long before they are gone and I am left wishing I had one more day with them.